“It’s stupid to compare lives,” ruminates former idealist turned jaded cynic Brad Sloan (Ben Stiller) on the eve of accompanying his son Troy (Austin Abrahams) from the sleepy suburbs of Sacramento to the bustling boulevards of Boston for a round of college interviews, “but when I do, I feel sometimes I failed.” To which he adds, with a world weariness bordering on despair, “And over time these feelings get worse.” If Gillette made movie openings!

When Brad was young, he was in love with the world and the world was in love with him. But three years shy of the big five-oh, comparisons with his contemporaries leave him looking at the world through a glass darkly. Nick (writer and director Mike White) is a successful Hollywood producer, Jason (Luke Wilson) is a jet-setting property developer, Billy (Jemaine Clement) is a hairy-chested lothario who sold up his tech company for sex on the beach and Craig (Michael Sheen) is a former White House press officer turned best-selling author of Political Beasts. Brad, by contrast, is the sole employee of a non-profit organisation whose laudable intentions are reduced to “crowd sourcing”.

“We didn’t work this hard to die in a flop-house,” he tells his content and beloved wife Melanie (Jenna Fischer) before they embark on a volley of one-liners. “We’re not poor, Brad.” “In some circles, yes.” “In what circles? The 1%? We have a great life.” That may be, but Brad isn’t feeling it. And when he accompanies his son to Boston he isn’t feeling it even more. For Troy, along with his intelligent and beautiful friends Ananya (Shazi Raja) and Maya (Luisa Lee), have their whole lives ahead of them. Whereas life for Brad is not a “playground” or a “dream” or “heaven manifested”, but a “battlefield” in which he feels he has “plateaued” and is “running out of time”.

But slowly, as he steps off the travelator of “life, Jim, but not as we know it” for a few days, he begins to realise that all that glitters is not gold. And that, actually, what he has is “enough” and what he and his beloved wife have been doing for the past couple of decades is planting the seeds and nurturing the growth of their son whom he describes as an “amazing creature”. It may not be the life that he imagined. But it is life nonetheless, his life, their life. And “white, male and first world problems” aside, it is a life which they are fortunate to be happy and healthy enough to enjoy!

The chemistry between Stiller and Abrahams is beautiful, funny and moving. The former, a well-meaning but misguided father who only wants the best for his son but can’t help putting his foot in it. The latter, a deadpan and monosyllabic teenager whose cool as a cucumber exterior hides a sea of emotions which swell as quickly as they calm. Stiller’s great, but Abraham’s terrific: fresh, natural, in the moment and real. The piano and strings score by Mark Mothersbaugh is likewise quirky and light touch. And White’s direction cushions the action with enough time and space to allow the said and the unsaid to percolate through our minds and stir our hearts. The strings of which are broken when Troy tells his father “I love you.”

Director: Mike White
Writer: Mike White
Stars: Ben Stiller, Austin Abrams, Jenna Fischer
Peter Callaghan